A mother’s guilt is tough, it’s raw and it’s draining. It sometimes consumes us and it can also be a friendly reminder that we’re good mothers, even when we think we’re not. I’m very guilty of feeling guilty. Even though I know I’m a good mom. I often still find myself doubting my parenting because of this Mom Guilt thing.
I have been back to work since November and as much as I love being back, it’s also been a challenge transitioning. I use to think that it was hard when when it was only Owen. Organizing daycare, school pick ups, drop off’s, the house, work and don’t even get me started on sleep. I thought I knew what sleep deprivation was before HA. I laugh at that one. There’s a lot that I’m missing since being back to work like school trips, volunteering, sending Owen off to school and picking him up, the one on one time during the day with Ella. It can be a tough pill to swallow dropping her off at daycare. Of course I feel the daily guilt that I’m not so easily available like I use to be. But I also remind myself that in the long run my kids will thank me later. They will understand and hopefully appreciate everything Drew and I do for them. Teaching them independence, responsibility and the value of a dollar. All the hard work we do pays off more than just financially!
In reality, I know there’s no such thing as a perfect parent. But why do we set such high standards to be so called ‘Perfect Moms’? We do so much and still feel at the end of the day like we’re the only ones who failed. We beat ourselves up over the littlest things. I can do a million perfect things in a day and find out Owen’s behind in reading and I beat myself up over it. We’re always trying to be superhero’s, true fact, we’re not. We’re only human with incredibly cute kids. We need to remind ourselves that we can’t do everything, it’s not possible to do everything and stay sane. You could try and to it all but be warned, prepare to become insane!
Eventually we will find our balance. So far it’s been a team effort and I’m proud of what we’ve done so far. As for myself, I’m taking control over that mom guilt. I take it and turn it into something positive and remind myself daily that it’s just me being a good parent. To all you moms cheers to you, you work hard and your limits are tested daily. You take on a lot in one day. Just remember your a damn good mom! Despite what you may think some days..
Keisha, xx
Ah! This blog came at the perfect time! Today was my first day back to work…. And my last day alone at home with Ashlyn. My heart broke as her legs clung to me. Blood shot eyes when I got the office. So much mom guilt today! Been working so hard and doing so much as I try to build M&P… I feel like I didn’t spend enough time holding her while I could. Hopefully this feeling passes soon! Thanks for sharing. We truly are all in this together! Xx
So true- no matter what we do, there’s the Mom guilt. I think we always think we’re doing it wrong, or screwing up our kids. But, in the end- the fact that we’re worrying about it means that we’re great moms!
It sounds like you have things managed, even if it doesn’t feel like it.
I’m not a mom yet, and I already feel guilty… Organic produce, what’s that? 😉
hahaha! True, true!
Love this… the mom guilt is a killer. I have 5 kids and I constantly feel like I am failing at least one of them. Cheers to you for reminding us all that showing up and trying our best is pretty damn good. Parenting is no joke. It’s seriously hard work.
BTW I have an Owen and an Ella too 🙂
Oh my goodness, 5! your amazing mama. And that is too cute!! haha what a small world! xo
Awww don’t be so hard on yourself, being a momma is tough I am sure. I see a lot of my friends spending plenty of time with their kids and yet feeling guilty too. You are doing so much for your kid, including your work which is infact for your own sweet kid 🙂
xx, Kusum | http://www.sveeteskapes.com
You do what you think is best and your job is to be honest with yourself and continually assess and question your options and decisions – parenthood. Never gets easier, but so worth it.
I saw that Bingo card on facebook and thought it was hilarious. I think no matter what if you’re a mom you face mommy guilt though – although I’m sure going back to hard is extra hard. I find myself facing mommy guilt just when I spend time blogging instead of with my kids. Or on the days where I’m so drained by listening to 2 kids cry all day that I’m a vegetable by the end and just turn on Mickey Mouse. Or when I realize one of my friends is better at teaching their kid colors than I am since my kid hasn’t learned them and there’s has.
Totally, I try and blog at night but honestly I get so tired.. Sometimes I don’t quite make it! It’s all part of finding a balance I guess which I’m still trying to figure out since being back to work.. Take care mama xx